It Is Well

My favorite hymn is It Is Well with My Soul. Every single time I hear it, I am inspired, humbled, and reminded me that God is Sovereign.

Lately I don't think I've been living consistently with that message. God is Sovereign. God is in control. God does as He wills in His time. I know these things. I don't always live as if I know these things.

I've written about doubt before. What I'm learning is that doubt is not the opposite of faith. The opposite of faith is doing things myself. Or trying to make things happen myself.

In this season of our lives, I've been wondering what I need to be doing. Do I just sit and wait? Do I look and explore? WHAT DO I DO?

And I don't feel that it has been well with my soul.

So, this week, God taught me (again) to be where I am. This is what my calling is now. I don't need to go looking around for what's next. This is my next. (I know. I've written about this before. I'm a slow learner.)

It has been well. I feel a weight lift off.

I am listening and waiting. I'm doing what I know God has called me to do. I do new things when they open up.

And now I'm going to stop trying to pry things open myself.

It is well with my soul.

A New Thing

I always like the new year. It makes me feel like I can completely change. That everything that has happened in the old year is now past and I can make a new commitment or new habit or new way.

Of course, lots of those "new" things happen only a few times or not at all.

A few years ago, I began choosing one word for the year - one word to be the focus for the year. I do this instead of making resolutions. For 2015, I chose the word YES. This year I want to say yes to God and every way He is leading. I hope my yes is apparent, even before knowing the way He's leading.

I also try to choose a verse for the year, a verse that will help guide what I do. When I read Isaiah 43:19, I knew it was the verse for this year.

Look, I am about to do something new; even now it is coming. Do you not see it? Indeed I will make a way in the wilderness, rivers in the desert. (Is. 43:19)

We want to see the new things that God is doing. We want to say yes, to be open to being a part of whatever new thing is coming.

Happy 2015! May God do something new in your life. We cannot wait to see what adventures await us.


(You can read more about my 2015 word on Brick by Brick.)

An Eternal Hope

I love teaching kindergartners. Children always give me a feeling of hope. Whenever I talk with them or spend time with them, I see a world of possibilities and energy and imagination and ideas. They think nothing is impossible. They are ready to try anything. They are curious and eager to explore. And, if they encounter difficulty, they keep on trying. They are always hoping and pressing on.

As an adult I often venture into the world with a hopeful attitude. But often that hope is in my own ability or the circumstances or my knowledge or just strength of will. That kind of hope is situational. It depends on what I can do or what others can do for me.

Today we face a world full of reasons not to hope. Challenges to our families, our children, our own selves seem to come at us from every side. It’s a time “rational” thought would say is hopeless. Situational hope evaporates. But God is a God of eternal hope.

In Romans, Paul wrote that Abraham believed, hoping against hope, that he would become the father of man nations. “Rational” thought would say this was impossible. Nothing in the situation gave hope. Abraham and Sarah were too old to become parents. But Abraham put his hope in God and God’s promise; God fulfilled His Word.

Mary faced a similar situation when the angel came to her. “Rational” thought would drive out earthly hope; a virgin cannot have a baby. But Mary believed God, put her hope in God to fulfill His Word. And He did.

The baby that God sent is a child of hope. The hope of a Messiah. The hope of rescue from a life of bondage to sin. Hope that life is more than this earthly existence. Hope that conquers any situation or circumstance. Our Sovereign God, our God of grace, give eternal hope through the birth, life, death, and resurrection of His Son.

Journey vs Destination

We like to drive. In fact, most of our past vacations have been about driving around and not necessarily getting to a certain place to do something. Even now, when I'm feeling restless, we will just drive around for a while. The enjoyment, the important part, is the traveling together and enjoying what we see along the way. The journey is more than just marking time until we reach a certain place.

This week I suddenly realized something. I've been thinking about this "middle" time as just a means to an end. This time of waiting and trusting is more than just an in-between. It is not just marking time until the next important thing.

This is the next important thing.

So often in the past months, I've been doing what I need to do. But when any opportunity shows up, I think, "This is the one that will get me moving again. This will be the next important thing."

I've not been enjoying the journey. I've not been paying attention to what is happening right now. Or at least I've not been seeing what's happening now as my "real life." It's just been a way-station until I get to the next part of my real life (in my view).

But that's not true. This is my real life now. I've had great time to think and write. I've had opportunities I wouldn't have been able to experience. I've enjoyed those experiences but not relished them as an important part of who I am and what I do. I haven't seen those as part of what God has called me to do overall - they've just been part of what's happening now.

I've been too quick to say, "I'm not teaching now but ...." I feel apologetic about what I'm doing now. And I shouldn't. God has led us to this exciting and challenging journey.

But this is my life now. My real life. The position God has called me to right now. It may last a few more weeks or a few more months or longer. We don't know when things will change or when God will call us to something new. This is our journey and destination at the moment.

We will enjoy the journey as we live it. And relish each moment along the way.

Room for Doubt?

I wonder. Did Mary ever doubt? Did Joseph wonder about things in the midst of Mary's pregnancy? After all, they faced some pressures from their culture - Mary pregnant before marriage; Joseph marrying her instead of putting her away in disgrace.

I know that God called Mary and Joseph for their specific purposes and they willingly obeyed and submitted to His call. But they were people, too. I wonder if they had moments when they were really unsure about this path they were on.

Sometimes I wonder if I have blundered into a wrong path. If where I am is God's leading or my own wanderings. I wonder how things will come together. I wonder if I'm foolish to subject my wife to uncertainty. I sometimes feel doubtful that we're being recklessly obedience and are just being reckless.

Is there room for doubt in a life of reckless obedience?

I think that we should continually listen and reflect. We should evaluate what we are doing in light of God's leading through His Word and His people.

I worry that doubt is showing a lack of faith. But I'm learning that perhaps doubt can be an avenue to strengthen my faith. When I wonder about my path and pray and listen and read and pray again, I am continuing to try and align myself with God. If my wondering leads to more focus on Him, then that "doubt" can renew my commitment and faith.

Paul wrote:

I am sure of this, that He who started a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. (Philippians 1:6).

I never doubt God. I do doubt my understanding of His will sometimes. But He will continue to work to complete in me what He purposes. I must listen and pray and trust.

Giving Thanks

God has blessed us this year. I'm so thankful. We are so blessed.

I have a wonderful wife - who laughs at my jokes (every time) and encourages me. She listens to my whining and then tells me to get over it (sometimes in a loving way, sometimes in a tough way, but always in the way I need it).

I am more thankful this year because she is still here. She had a bad car accident in April but has recovered very well. She's back to basically where she was before. I am so thankful to God for that.

I have a dependable truck. It's our only vehicle now. But I am so thankful for it, even when it seems a little cramped with my backpack, Cindy's work, and the two of us. And, since we only have one vehicle, I get to spend lots more time with Cindy as I drive her to the places she needs to go. I am so thankful that I get to spend so much time with her.

We have food on our table. More than we need usually. Because of the accident, I became the designated grocery shopper - and I like it (most weeks). I learned how to cook more things. Now I can help with that task, either doing it myself or helping Cindy as she does it. 

We have a wonderful church family. So many people have given time or gift cards or prayers. So many encouraging words and offers of help. We are so blessed. We are so grateful.

Who knew that so many blessings were hidden in an auto accident?

I do not have a full-time job right now. But, if I did have a job, transportation would be an issue. I would have less time to spend on helping out with errands and other stuff. I would have less time to travel around town with Cindy. I would have less time to spend on my college courses.  I am thankful that I am freelancing at the moment and not working full time. 

Who knew that blessings were hidden in the lack of a job?

Counting blessing is so much better than nursing hurts. Things have been a little unsettled for me lately. The middle of something new can be a little discouraging. 

But when I look back at this year...when I see what God has done...when I see how much I need to do to honor Him in the ways I should...I am so grateful.

Who knew all the blessing we would see this year in so many unexpected ways? God did. 

He is the God who knows. He is the God who leads. He is the God who rules.

We are so blessed. We are so thankful.

Lesson of the Handrail

The other day I was talking to a friend. We were talking about my university classes and my writing assignments, among other things. He asked, "Are you doing all right?"

I nodded quickly. "Oh, yes. We are doing just fine."

Then he said something that I don't think I'll soon forget. "If you need help, just ask us. I know you won't. But we want to help if you need it."

I know you won't.

Four words that so often sum up our approach to asking for help. We don't ask.

If someone came to us and said he needed help, with anything, we would do whatever we could to give the help he needed. Or work to find someone to help him out. We would not hesitate.

But when we are the ones that may need a little help, we hesitate. We think of ways to deal with the situation on our own. We don't ask someone else to give us a hand.

For Cindy and me, the wreck changed that somewhat. We had to have some help. I still hesitated asking when I needed it. But I now have a tangible reminder of the importance of asking for help. Our handrail.

Cindy had to have a handrail on our front steps to get into the house. We didn't have a rail. Cindy (not I) asked for help. Now we have a solid, expert-built handrail that we will continue to use for many years to come.

Cindy asked. People helped. And it's so much better than if I had tried to put something up. (Construction is not my gift.)

We need to ask others when we need help. We need to allow others to have the blessing of giving us, of using what God has given them to minister to us. We need to have the blessing of receiving. A valuable lesson that I'm still learning.

My friend's words about not asking for help also clicked for me on a deeper level. So often I try to face things alone or try to survive alone - without asking God for help. God's strength and power are so much more than ours. He will answer when we call. But often we try to do it alone.

When we take things on ourselves, we fail. Oh, we might scrape by, this time. But we do not live victoriously. And, more often, we fall down hard and miss the blessing that God has for us.

I cannot do everything myself - no matter what competent front I put up. I cannot do everything. God has gifted people in many different ways and some of those are just waiting for someone to need their expert help.

And our God will help, if we stop trying to be self-sufficient. I cannot do it. He can.

Maybe if I use the handrail enough times, I'll remember this lesson.

Now as we have many parts in one body, and all the parts do not have the same function, in the same way we who are many are one body in Christ and individually members of one another. Romans 12:4-5

I raise my eyes to toward the mountains. Where will my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth. Psalm 121:1-2